Everybody was doing it, So I did it too.

I’m at the Thompson library, studying for my midterm, and there’s a man in here that is completely lost. He’s sitting at a study table, intently focused on his calculus book… decked out from head to toe in Wolverine clothing!  Now, I’m not usually a big promoter of rivalry, but this is clearly my call to duty to support my university! I will not stand for such treason!

Pssssst! Psssst! Hey! Hey you! Guy decked out in Michigan gear! What do you think you’re doing here?!

He’s ignoring me. I’ve got to move closer so he can hear me. I’ll move to the table next to him.

Pssst! Psssst!

Maybe he can’t hear me since I’m whispering…I’ll try snapping my fingers a few times, get his attention.

Guy! Michigan Guy! Who the heck do you think you are?! This is the home for the buckeyes! Why are you wearing a Michigan sweater?!

He glanced up quickly and then looked back at his book. Ooh I bet he’s nervous. And why shouldn’t he be? Supporting the Wolverines while surrounded by crazy nuts…I’d be nervous too.

That’s right! I’m talking to you! You in the blue and yellow jacket! 

Hmm… no response…
 
Come on! Put up a fight! I’ll prove it to you that Buckeyes can be tough!!  Well, I mean the nuts. Clearly the students and football players are tough, but I don’t feel like I should have to clarify that. The nuts on the other hand, can be easily dented. One time, I put one in my purse and my wallet nearly smashed the nut into pieces.

Psssst! Psssst! Hey… Hey! Can you hear me?! Look, I’d really appreciate it if you’d take out your headphones; I’m clearly trying to talk to you.

What?  I don’t care if you’re trying to study! You’re supporting the rival team!

Oh sure…  And my mom bought this Tennessee sweater for me because she graduated from there. Yea, right. I’m not buying it kid!

Oh good, a Thompson library worker is approaching us… clearly distraught about the scene the traitor is making no doubt. Good, finally some reinforcements.

Oh good you’re here. Kick this guy out, he clearly doesn’t belong.

Me?!  I’m not being rude! I’m defending my home team!

Kick me out? Why?! For whispering?!  Yelling?! Oh I am not yelling I am speaking at a hushed tone at best.

You’ve got to be kidding me- this kid! This kid is wearing Wolverine clothes and using our books! You should be kicking him out!

Ban me from the library for the rest of the quarter? Okay. Fine. I’m going. But one last thing!

ANN ARBOR’S A BRAT!! HAHAHAHA!

What?  Well duh, I know that’s not the real saying but come on, we’re in a library, I don’t want to be rude.